Memories!

[jaelie]

When I was in high school (either a freshman or sophomore), my big brother and I were on an Allan Dean Foster kick. We both really enjoyed one of his books, Glory Lane. It's a rather silly book, but I loved it.

Anyway, what brought this up? The main character, a punk rocker who called himself "Seeth", had a little card and used it in the story once to try to pick up a cute girl. Well, my dear brother made one for me and gave it to me in high school.

It's about the same size as an ATM card, although it's battered with time and the lamination is separating along one edge. Several of the letters are smudged, as it was created with a typewriter. It, however, still has the power to amuse me, which is why it is still in my wallet after all these years:





The Bearer of this Card is Neither a
Convicted Felon nor a Lybian Terrorist
Nor does She Suffer From AIDS or Any
Other Exotic Disease. She is not Mute
Nor is This a Solicitation for Money.

In Point of Fact This Card Has No
Purpose Whatsoever Except to Occupy
and Otherwise Waste Thirty Seconds
of Another Overly Curious Person's
Time. Successful Isn't it?



Hehe.